Secrets To The #BestLifeEver Married Life

#BestLifeEver

Everyone wants to be happy. Especially those who are promised in marriage. 

Mark and Brenda Askew began their best life ever on October 25, 1980. Since then Fall has had a special nostalgic meaning to them. Warm, golden oak trees dance in the wind and hug the sky, blowing crimson carpets of leaves onto a path for their anniversary day stroll. Baked pumpkin pie, cinnamon swirl in hot steaming mugs of nutmeg and her warm smile. What a smile. After 36 years making the best memories, I believe the best of life is yet to come.


What is the secret to wedded bliss? How can you make your married life the #BestLifeEver? There are four basic keys.

1. Get to know yourself well. Your fears, those you truly love, and the things that bring you deep joy.

2. Learn to find happiness in giving little things that have special meaning to the receiver.

3. Make it your aim to share yourself with your spouse and value those moments when he does the same.

4. Remember there is a time for everything under the sun. Know what time it is and respond accordingly. Live in the moment and be supportive.

5. Discuss your expectations with your mate and explain why you choose to be strong, loyal and focused.

6. Put down the cell phone, Ipad and other distractions when you're together. Make each other your distraction.

7. Discuss your budget at least once a month. Get on the same page. Consult before making major purchases or entering credit obligations.

8. Make date night sacred. Just the two of you. No one interferes.

Take a glimpse into Mark and Brenda's 36 years together  here... https://www.facebook.com/Best-Life-Ever-Party-and-Event-Planner-1756357731298288/

For more #BestLifeEver tips go to...
http://www.familyreunionplanning.info

Getting Married? Get My Keepsake Wedding Planner by Wedding Planner blogger Mark Angelo 

Date Night Idea List

After 35 years Brenda and I are still very much enamored with each other. I sometimes catch her looking and smiling at me while I sleep. A look of peace, affection and yes, that last minute look of 'whoops, you caught me staring again.' It's proof positive that when your willing to work harder on your marriage than anything else in life the dividends are great.

What We've Learned

Have you ever noticed? We are at our absolute worst when we are tired. We're disoriented and fatigued, touchy and snappy.  When rest is lacking we are impatient and disagreeable. That said, our first priority needs to be learning how to put life on hold and rest. It makes all the difference. After getting much-needed rest we can enjoy a relaxing afternoon or evening together.

The Importance of Dating

We found this solution early in our marriage and have kept applying it ever since. We call it Date Night. Date night helps keep the home fires burning. Establish a weekly day, afternoon or evening to focus undistracted on the two of you. Turn off the cell phone. Tell your friends and colleagues that you should not be disturbed on this day and then have at it. Dating in this way should never end. Whether you're 24 or 84, it is the lifeblood of a strong healthy relationship between two very busy people.

Hot vs Warm and Cozy

No, we don't aim for a  hot steamy evening full of romantic posturing. We prefer a simple warm and cozy atmosphere. The rest comes naturally. But to make date night work, we had to learn to make five basic rules of conduct a priority. And when we did, date night began to work its wonders on us.

Date Night Priority List
1. Getting plenty of sleep the night before date night.
2. Making weekly date night an unbroken sacred ritual.
3. Choose employment that won't suck the life out of us.
4. Make date night enjoyable and relaxing.
5. No discussions about problems or work-related issues.
6. No distractions such as cell phone calls or texting
7. Let everyone know that date night is sacred and you should not be disturbed

Date Night Ideas List

Date night should be like cooking a crockpot dinner once a week. The ingredients may be few and simple, but it always seems to turn out delicious, filling the house with an amazing aroma. Date night should be carefully planned well in advance. It should be a time to creatively say "I love you" in word or deed. But it should always be simply stated, uncomplicated and stress-free in order to work. That said we've put together what we call an after wedding Date Night Idea List to keep the home embers warm. Share it, print it, pin it, but most of all enjoy it.

Date Night Ideas List

Start planning your wedding well in advance with My Keepsake Wedding Planner - Everything you need to plan your Wedding, Wedding night and Honeymoon.

Congratulations November Brides and Fiancees

If you were proposed to this month or were married congratulations November brides and fiancees.

Who doesn't like a warm sticky cinnamon bun fresh out of the oven. A hot brewed aromatic coffee made from roasted coffee beans. A fluffy blanket and a warm body to cuddle on a cold frigid night. A hand to hold and arm to cling to during a noon stroll. This month is all about true commitment and the little things couples do that add warmth, spice and stickiness to their union.  I'm 52 years of age and my wife Brenda is 53. We have been married for 33 years. No previous marriages. We recently celebrated our Anniversary October 25th 2013 surrounded by the most beautiful fall foliage ever.

While we both enjoy event planning like reunions and family night as well as speaking and officiating weddings ceremonies. Brenda is the more outgoing free spirit and organizer. I am the creative one who happens to like to write. I enjoy working on projects and parties with her, but I don't mind spending long hours working alone in the home office. My wife on the other hand is the kind of person who likes to get out and go. That said, we could easily miss spending meaningful time together. To remedy this we make it a  point to call each other each day and ask how the day is going and explain what we are doing and the progress  we're making.

We plan our meals and exchange an expression of endearment before ending the conversation. She calls me Booh. I call her Baah. In addition we don't let anything get in the way of our Friday evening date night. Because we are both frugal we will plan something simple like a picnic and stroll around the reservoir or listen to oldies but goodies in the car with the top open. Or watch a movie or two at home sharing a bowl of popcorn or chips.

Brenda engages in secular work in addition to community work. She said, " I deeply appreciate it when Mark does the cooking, serving and dish washing. It makes me feel that I'm cherished and appreciated and that my share of the work is not taken for granted. Our little dates keep the tenderness, closeness and warmth in the relationship. I love it when he holds my hand even if he's just walking me to the car."

Mark runs an online business and does much in the way of ministering to a local congregation. A work spanning three generations. In addition his parents are dealing with the challenges that come with aging.  He said, "My aging parents have been ill for some time now, requiring multiple operations and ongoing nursing. This can take a toll on a person. I really appreciate it when Brenda accompanies me to visit my parents. She contributes a lot in the way of being empathetic and upbuilding. It makes me feel supported and that I'm not alone dealing with this challenge."

Mark and Brenda are also authors of the book Fimark's Family Reunion Planner Guide and Keepsake and the book My Keepsake Wedding Planner.  Mark says, "Brenda does not know it but she started these book by compiling event planning notes useful templates and documents for her  gatherings. I just added content based on our life's experience.  The fact that we both worked on several projects together makes me feel that we did not come together based on mere attraction put to make two parts a whole. Focusing on our similarities and being empowered by our differences gives us a kind of oneness. I love that about us."

Keeping Love Embers Warm

Keeping Love Embers Warm

If you're planning you're honeymoon right about now you may be thinking about an exciting, fun and deeply romantic vacation get-away as a good jump-start to married life after the honeymoon. Perhaps, but that depends on how soon the bonding process begins and when both partners acknowledge the need to share common standards and principles in the relationship. This can take some time as important issues often aren't dealt with until the unforeseen test occurs. Still who wants to wait? 
So how do you start the flame and keep the embers burning months and years after the honeymoon? Is there a spark that ignites a fire that melts the very heart of your partner so deeply that even when cooled by stormy weather there stands a strong bond in the very core that is virtually inextinguishable?

Too often couples get so caught up in their jobs, careers and past-times, like all engrossing sports, bands and clubs of the day that they begin to see their spouse as someone who is getting in the way of their fun and begin spending less meaningful moments with the love of their life. This can happen to anyone. At first it's just a casual oversight. But over time hearts break, silence becomes the loudest spoken word and the two drift apart emotionally and spiritually.

Do More Than Compromise
This past Sunday we talked to a very special couple married for over five years. He's contending with a new job and new congregation responsibilities that sometimes leaves them both a bit overwhelmed. That said, we reminded them both to prioritize each other and asked them both to consider this... When they come together for fun, do more than just compromise! Spend time doing things that they both enjoy doing together instead.

Schedule a Date Night 
Ask any truly happy couple what kept them together and they'll tell you that they're still dating. They eat together. Listen to music together, joke and tell stories together. Dance together. But the key to making date night work is not just doing something together as some activities can actually drive a couple apart. So what's the key to an enjoyable date night?

"A Few of Our Favorite Things."
Sometimes we are too tired to think about what we have in common and we settle for what ever comes to mind for a date night activity. We all love the musical called "The Sound of Music." Particularly the part we fondly call "My Favorite Things." It was that moment in time that the family bonded. So it is with a young couple. Everyone likes to eat. Everyone likes music. Most like movies. On date night, share a favorite dessert you both enjoy. Watch a movie you both will like. Select music that has meaning to both of you. If you're at a loss as to what to do this would be a good time to consult the "favorite things list."

Just Released Fimark's My Keepsake Wedding Planner

In our newly written book "Fimark's My Keepsake Wedding Planner" Brenda and I have dedicated 10 pages to this subject including a keepsake list called "A Few of Our Favorite Things." It's a keepsake checklist of the things the couple has in common.

Many years ago Brenda and I were at a cross road in our relationship. We took the time to write out a list of entertainment, literature, music and activities we both enjoyed doing together. We were amazed as we discovered that we had more in common that we ever realized.

Discovering the things both enjoy doing together in the area of music, books, movies, sports, food, etc is something we've learned a couple cannot do without. Our book "Fimark's My Keepsake Wedding Planner" is now available at Amazon.com. http://goo.gl/fvLl2